24 – just as exciting as the Fox version, but without Keifer Sutherland and a lot more puke.

6:00 am  He’s up, a little earlier than normal but not unusually early.  Still, I’m walking dead, so I make him a bottle and lay down in bed with him, hoping to lull him back to sleep.  This has never worked and continues to not work on this day.  I hand him the iPhone.

6:30 am   He’s super cranky.  He keeps asking me to find a different video then rejects it  instantly and asks for another one.  As his mood further darkens, I take it and tell him no more iPhone.

6:35 am  The flu virus that is lurking inside him will not accept this indignity and erupts in protest.

6:36 am – 7:20 am Open mouthed, red faced wailing begins and continues unabated.

6:36 am – 7:20 am  ( Our bedroom)  Alex remains soundly sleeping.  Twenty feet away.

7:21 am – 7:30 am  Alex is suddenly awakened…..ahem.  His ability to sleep through a miserably crying child is pondered.  Angrily.

7:30 am  All the almond milk that had been, just seconds earlier, inside Luka’s little belly, is now all over the couch.  And then the carpet.  Then portions of the floor.

7:31 am – 7:45 am  Flurry of panic as we wipe and sop.  Luka cries.

7:46 am – 8:30 am  Snuggling and cuddling my sick boy.  Papa leaves for work.

8:31 am – 11:30 am  We stay in bed.  Luka can’t sleep despite his heavy eyes, he’s so sick.  He doesn’t want to eat, or watch videos.  He doesn’t want the iPad.  He doesn’t want the iPad!  This is really serious.  I skype my sister, an objective observer with two grown children of her own who will surely put me at ease.  She views him on her computer and cooly advises me that he is suffering from a brain bleed due to all the head bonks he’s recently suffered.  Holy what?!  ( with friends like this…..)  I call the pediatrician, describe the situation and make an appointment for 3:15.

11:31 am – 12:30 pm  I sneak out of the room and get some chores done downstairs.  Luka makes a weak peep and I dash back up.  Puke again.  A giant pool in the middle of my bed and, no…. NO….not the duvet cover!  Shiiiiiiiiiiit.  Now I have to remove it and that means I’ll have to put it back on.  I take a couple of minutes to feel really sorry for myself.

12:31 pm- 12:50 pm  I remove the duvet and all the sheets and mattress cover while somehow balancing a weak little monkey on my hip.

12:51 pm – 1:00 pm  The Dr’s office calls.  Based on my – entirely accurate!- description of the situation, the Dr. is wondering if this is an ER situation.  I answer no to all the questions the nurse asks and it’s determined that there is no emergency.  I am now convinced that this is an emergency.

1:01 pm- 1:10 pm  I make my seventh call of the day to Alex and tell him that the Dr. thought it might be an emergency.  I tell him what questions were asked.  He says he knows what the Dr. thought it might be, but that Luka clearly doesn’t have it.  He refuses to tell me what is.  Something about going online and becoming hysterical.  He goes on his rant about how our pediatrician hit the lottery when he got me as a patient.

1:11 pm – 2:45 pm  Luka sleeps in my lap.  I talk on and off with my sister.  We discuss the illness.  She further convinces me that he is near death.

2:46 pm-3:15 pm  Luka sits up and asks for apples.  Encouraged I walk to the kitchen to get him a couple slices.  Behind me I hear the padding of little feet.  Luka is walking behind me, smiling.  He begins to talk and sing and eat apples.  Are you kidding me, kid?  Seriously? Fifteen minutes before we head to the Doctor?

3:15 pm- 4:15 pm  Luka makes a big show of being completely fine and not at all sick while we’re in the waiting room.  He’s banging the cupboard doors when the Dr. comes into the examining room. ” Well, this doesn’t look like a sick kid. ”

” Oh, hahaha.  He really was.  I swear he was really sick all day.  Hahaha .”  I glower at Luka.

4:16 pm- 7:00 pm   Mr. Miraculous recovery is sick again.  I put him to bed and he falls right to sleep.

8:42 pm- 9:00 pm  He calls for me and I discover him, feverish and laying in his vomit.  I quickly call my husband.  He tells me that it’s fine, this is standard for a stomach virus.  I disregard him and frantically call the on-call doctor.  I’m determined to prove my husband medically wrong.  This is standard procedure.

9:01 pm – 9:15 pm  While speaking with the doctor, who confirms that a fever is common with a stomach flu ( damn you, Alex!), I realize that the vomit in Luka’s crib is actually just water spilled from his bottle.  Ooomps.   I need to go to bed.

9:16 pm – 10:00 pm  We snuggle and watch The Polar Express.  I’ve never seen it before. How I hated it.  What the hell was that?  Luka says ” tutu, tutu, tutu” at least forty times before I realize he’s telling me that he sees a ‘ choo-choo train’.  I’m overcome with guilt for  not understanding him.  He’s so devastatingly little and sweet.  Baby Tylenol kicks in and he begins to run around and play and sing.

10:01 pm- 10:30 pm   I let him make up for lost play time and then usher us off to bed.  It goes smoothly.

10:31 pm- 11:00 pm  Alex arrives home, and I recall the day for him.  There is a lot of head shaking ( at me) and sad faces ( for Luka).

11:01 pm – 5:59 am  Sleep

6:00 am    He’s awake early again, but happy as a clam.







Heather Bogolyubova

About Heather Bogolyubova

Heather Bogolyubova has an un-pronouncable last name. A Maine native, she's returned to the Pine Tree state after several years in New York. Now, she's a newlywed, has a new baby, a new job, and lots of fancy shoes she can never wear in the snow. The job: Stay-at- home mother and wife. Its hard. She's going to tell you all.